Last week we covered expert negotiator Chris Voss’ advice to move from “You’re right” to “That’s right” in order to build trust and separate you from other agents. You do this because people can’t hear you until they feel heard and they won’t understand you until they feel understood.
Here are 3 tools to get you to “That’s right”. First, Naming. Which is stating what you think the other person is feeling, thinking or doing. It usually starts with phrases like “It seems like…” or “You’re probably thinking or feeling…” This requires deep listening, but it will get you deep into the person’s head and the heart. And don’t worry about being wrong. People will love correcting you.
Second, Repeating. Simply repeat the last word or two someone says prompting them to expand on the subject. For example, if a seller says “We need to move quickly” reply “Quickly?” “Yes, we only have 2 months until I start my new job”. This is a powerful tool to get people fully express their thoughts and feelings.
Third, switch from “l” to “You”. The more you remove “l”, I think…I know…and instead say “you” the more you will be talking about their needs, desires and concerns. These 3 tools will build the foundation of trust that will not only make everything in the rest of the transaction easier, but your entire business going forward.
Keep elevating our industry!
David Veldkamp
Owner | RE/MAX GR
Mobile: 616.460.6123
Office: 616.957.0700